What is frigidity in women: how to establish an intimate life and restore past emotions in a relationship with a husband

"Unwanted woman" - this word can sometimes be heard in the confessions of the fair sex, who consider themselves frigid. There are a lot of reasons for sexual coldness: from children's herbs and features of education to serious diseases. In most cases, it is possible to improve the situation with the methods of drug therapy, auto-training, hypnosis. Wikipedia can tell you this problem. Many men wonder why the wife is frigid and how to treat it.

What does "sexual coldness" mean?

Who is a frigid girl? Can frigidity be cured and how to deal with it? Frigidity is a concept that no one would like to hear about. That is why many women constantly simulate sexual arousal and orgasm, hide their problems, are ashamed and suffer from this even more. What is frigidity in women? First of all, this is the absence of any kind of sexual attraction to a partner, taking into account the fact that all possible mental or somatic diseases are excluded. As a consequence of frigidity, the following appears:

• the absence of any pleasant sensations with kisses, hugs, affection;
• complete indifference to any kind of intimate relationship;
• inability to achieve orgasm;
• there may be a fear of intimacy and even just men.

Myths and Truth

Considering that the modern image of a woman does not imply her coldness in any way, but, on the contrary, liberation is being circulated, many myths have appeared around frigidity. Of the most popular are the following.

• It's all about a man. Many women try to get away from the problem by hanging it on their partner and accusing them of insufficient attention, sexuality, and inexperience. In fact, most often the problem lies in the woman and her perception of the man.
• This is a serious illness.. Many consider frigid women to be sick. Of course, often with a thorough examination, somatic problems are found along with psychological ones. But frigidity can be a manifestation of the nature of a woman or the costs of her strictly upbringing.
• These are flawed women. In fact, for ladies who are freed from the “animal” instincts, it is easier to devote themselves completely to some business. From this point of view, they are even more complete than most non-frigid ones.
• This condition is incurable.. In fact, many disorders can be corrected depending on the desire of the woman.
• Only women are frigid. In fact, many "of the stronger sex" also suffer from this problem. Moreover, only in some cases the condition develops against the background of impotence, for the most part these are healthy men in this regard.
• Frigid women are barren. It's the opposite here. At home, watchful, without multiple sexual intercourse, they mostly become pregnant and have children without problems. After giving birth, a woman often hopes that this feature of her will pass, but this does not always happen.

Varieties and Causes

Depending on how severe the symptoms of frigidity in a woman are, the following degrees of pathology are distinguished.

• 1 degree - a woman receives moral, but not physical satisfaction from sexual intercourse, there is no orgasm and libido;
• 2 degree - intimate relationships are perceived as a routine family procedure, often a woman agrees to sex only for her husband;
• 3 degree - even thoughts about intimate relationships cause discomfort, vaginismus may develop.

Vaginismus - pain during sexual intercourse or their impossibility due to involuntary contraction of the muscles of the vagina.

What happens

Depending on the cause and form of sexual coldness, several types of pathology are distinguished.

• Primary. It is a variant of the norm in virgins - girls and adolescents. Due to the insufficient maturity of all systems and organs, as well as due to the lack of psychological preparedness, they are frigid. With puberty, the phenomenon passes.
• Retardation. It is characteristic of girls in adulthood and somewhat older. It manifests itself in the fact that not everyone has a strong attraction to the opposite sex and is able to experience an orgasm immediately after the onset of sexual activity. Usually this requires from several months to a couple of years, that is, a kind of "ripening".
• Psychogenic. This is the most common cause of sexual coldness. Frigidity usually appears after childhood mental trauma, an unsuccessful first experience, a strict attitude to sex in the family (as something dirty, low), after rape, because of fear for a sudden pregnancy. Often, psychological problems in the intimate sphere can occur after painful separation in sensitive women.
• Withdrawal symptoms. It occurs in women for some time after prolonged abstinence. In this case, all sensations during intimate relationships can be dulled, and the sensitivity of erogenous zones is reduced.
• Somatic. It is established when objective reasons are found in a state of health, for example, vaginismus, a disease of the endocrine system. Often frigidity appears after removal of the ovaries and other gynecological operations, with the onset of menopause.
• Constitutional. It takes place if a woman still feels the desire and can even achieve orgasm, but very rarely.
• Nymphomanic frigidity. It is characterized by the fact that a woman has a pathological passion for the opposite sex, but she does not get satisfaction from sexual relations. Often this leads to a constant change of sexual partners in search of the “best”.

In addition, frigidity may occur with certain medications. Often such a complication is recorded when taking the following drugs:

• narcotic drugs;
• antipsychotics;
• oral contraceptives.

During pregnancy and after childbirth

Physiological frigidity can occur in women during pregnancy, especially in the early stages and on the eve of childbirth.This is absolutely normal, as nature “protects” a woman in a critical time from possible complications. Formative birth dominant in the brain leads to inhibition of the departments responsible for sexual desire. However, this does not happen in all, and even in the same woman, during one pregnancy the libido can either disappear or intensify.

Postpartum frigidity is also known. This is due to the special hormonal background of a woman during this period, especially if she supports lactation. Experiences, lack of sleep, and puzzles by a baby play a role.

In the interpretation of Bern

Studying the causes of female frigidity, Berne, a doctor and scientist, formed a special prototype of the fair sex. In medicine, the wording of a special kind of frigidity “according to Berne” remained. Such a woman is characterized by the following:

• sudden mood swings;
• the belief that the husband (partner) needs only sex;
• flirt with other men to provoke her husband to jealousy;
• flirting can reach kisses;
• scandals with her husband, accusations of financial, social insolvency;
• at the stage of flirting and flirting, any attempt at sex ends.

Mimic or be treated

Many representatives of the fair sex, noticing signs of frigidity in themselves, try to hide them, embarrassed and believing that women should not have this. This leads to family disagreements, cheating on her husband. Such women often complain of bad mood, headaches and migraines, irritability, aggressiveness.

Drug therapy

It is far from always necessary to use drugs for treatment. The expediency of the appointment can only be determined by a specialist. The following remedies for frigidity are used.

• Tribestan. The drug is based on an extract of Tribulus terrestris. It has a general tonic effect and enhances libido in men and women. Take one tablet three times a day.
• "Female Viagra." The composition includes sildenafil, which stimulates an increase in blood flow to the pelvic organs, increasing the excitability and sensuality of erogenous zones.
• Ambosex The composition includes female and male sex hormones (estrogens and testosterone). Stimulates the "ripening" of the organs of the reproductive system, thereby increasing the likelihood of increased libido. Used in the form of tablets and injections, it is used strictly as directed by a doctor.

Psychological help

If the woman’s frigidity symptoms have appeared long ago and are rooted in the problems of childhood and youth, the first sexual intercourse, it will be extremely difficult to solve them independently. In such situations, it is most effective to consult a psychiatrist, psychotherapist, or sexologist. After a series of tests to diagnose the condition, they will build the most optimal treatment regimen.

Alternative methods of treating frigidity in women

Some herbs are able to influence the hormonal background of a woman, stabilizing and leveling it, stimulating libido. Some recipes are listed below, they are easy to cook at home.

• Yarrow and basil. You need to take five tablespoons of each variety of plants, mix and pour good wine in the amount of one liter. Let it brew for a month in a dark, cool place, and then take three tablespoons three times a day.
• Coriander. Grind half a tablespoon of dried coriander and pour 200 ml of boiling water. Let it brew for an hour, and then take 70 ml three times a day.
• Sage. You can brew instead of tea or prepare infusions. For the latter, you need to pour one tablespoon of 200 ml of hot water and hold in a water bath for half an hour. Divide into three equal shares and take during the day.

It is believed that essential oils can help get rid of frigidity in a woman or ensure its prevention if their vapors are regularly inhaled. The following are especially useful for this purpose:

• sage oil;
• ylang-ylang;
• of lavender;
• from bergamot.

Another folk remedy is to fill your food with aphrodisiac products that potentiate libido. They include the following:

• cabbage;
• bitter chocolate;
• cinnamonturmeric, pepper;
• bananas, strawberries;
• garlic;
• sea ​​fish and seafood.

Sexual coldness is the lot of a large number of women. Most often, one has to deal with the psychogenic causes of disorders in the sexual life. How to treat frigidity in a woman in a particular case can only be most effectively said by an experienced sexologist or psychotherapist. Do not be shy to contact such doctors. Only they can determine the true cause of frigidity, give a prognosis and choose therapy.

Reviews: “Even touch is unpleasant for me”

I am 24 years old, married, son 1.5 years old. My problem is that I am a frigid woman. I am emotional, impressionable, obligatory, executive, rather unsociable. She studied with her husband from the 1st year in the same group, they began to meet in the 3rd year. My husband had no one before me. He is serious, uncompromising, obligatory.
I met (I still can’t forgive myself for this), but I didn’t enter into close relations with anyone, because I think that the husband should be the first and preferably the only man, I think that only mutual loyalty of the spouses makes the family informal. At the beginning of the 4th year, we got married. For some time I hid from my husband that in moments of closeness I did not feel almost any sensations. Six months after the wedding, she told her husband about everything, because I could no longer lie to him. I violated mutual sincerity in our relations, which lost all meaning. They read literature, hoped that time would do its job. 3 years have passed, but there are no improvements. I am afraid of losing my husband, family, the only thing that is sacred to me is what we live for.

Monicahttp://devushkam.net/showthread.php?t=328

Oh girls ... .Never when I did not think that I would create a similar topic ... For her, I even created a left page ... .With a husband, we are 2.5 years old, the child is half a year old. My husband is a temperamental person, he needs a lot and for everyone. Before pregnancy, I also loved sex, after giving birth I became indifferent to him. Yes, I want to, but the desire to just lie in silence or sleep while the little one sleeps is overpowered. Against this background, conflicts with her husband. I read in nete that this is hormonal and will pass by the year, but by the year we are already divorcing such sex. Now many will write, do not offend your husband, through force! Damn, but I can’t !!!! And it hurts me from sudden movements, although the birth was easy and there were no breaks. Before pregnancy there were no such pains! Yesterday I told my husband that it was painful, to which I received an answer that everything was wrong, turned around and left, I won’t start talking on this topic anymore ... Yesterday I suggested going to a sexologist (or whatever) ... But this conversation ended in nothing ...I conclude that in this regard we do not understand each other .... He says that I am frigid ... What to do, it will come to a divorce ....

Masha Petrova, https://deti.mail.ru/id1013604305/

Virgin I can’t understand something, if a woman can experience an orgasm, then she is no longer frigid? It’s just that I consider myself frigid (a word that is unpleasant) I don’t want sexual intimacy at all, I had it with my first husband and now with my second (he completely tormented the poor), but in principle I can bring myself to a clitoral orgasm, or he will ... It's just that there is no desire and that’s all, and it’s very difficult to force myself ... Purely psychologically, I want to be a normal woman and want to enjoy sex, but physically everything is on a deep brake. Naturally, because of this, I have wild complexes, and I want to be a woman. Recently I bought myself an exciting cream, but somehow it didn’t really help. Yes, they talked with her husband before, he talked to me this way and that ... Even touching intimate places (including chest) is unpleasant for me. Before marriages at the age of 16-18 years, everything was fine and then how bent off. I thought about the doctor, but I don’t know which specific specialist I need to go to. And there were no more men ... (before that everything was OK). Sex causes me negative emotions, and therefore pain occurs during and after it.

Brownie http://forum.justlady.ru/index.php?showtopic=1421

I am 24 years old, I am a young and very attractive woman. I have never had a hang-up in fans, but there weren’t so many closer relationships. I noticed that I was not excited by prolonged caresses and preludes before sex. When sexual intercourse occurs, I don’t want anything. I want only one thing - to quickly end it all. In my entire sex life I have had an orgasm about 5 times. And it began to seem to me that I was really frigid. I don’t want sex, I get excited with difficulty, and I don’t feel any supernatural sensations from intercourse. This does not last the first month, but already several years. And you are absolutely right, the stories of my friends about “stormy orgasms” make me even more confident in my guesses

Angelica http://medscape.ru/user/1553-angelika/

Frigidity, because I DO NOT FEEL ANYTHING at THIS. Every day does not work, because he has hard work, he often gets tired. He comes home and can be said to fall. Yes, and we probably began to be afraid of each other. I want less and less. he falls into a guilty feeling and is afraid to start something. The last time the break was a whole month! And at the beginning (after childbirth) it was: every day and every other day. Just at this pace you feel like a cook, a washerwoman, a cleaning lady, and a SHOWER!

Larisa, http://www.psychologies.ru/personal/larisa-s/